Okay, so I was talking with a friend of mine just now, and I was also reading one of my earlier blog entries, finding my tired antics amusing. Seriously, if you haven't read those survival guides, go do so now; I swear, you'll laugh. Unless you don't like swearing. Or the fetal position. If you don't, keep reading here; it'll save you disappointment.
Anyways, I asked her if finding my own writing amusing was a bad thing, to which she replied that it wasn't; it just means it's just that funny. I tried to think up the word that described what I feel this action might come across as, and guess what? I was fucked by the language I've been learning, and am still learning, to speak since I was old enough to attempt to. Seriously, don't try and speak without teeth; you sound more like an idiot than normal. (For the record? I still haven't thought of that word. I'm pissed.)
The English language is hard. Every language has something about it that makes it difficult; Japanese makes you think you sound like you're trying to lift a house, Chinese makes you think you sound like a tape recorder being played backwards at mach speed... and German? Good grief, it sounds like you're about to murder someone with your words! Never mind writing half of this shit; I know France is one of the fashion capitals of the world, but do they have to dress up their words too? Wtf is a chapeau? It's one of these --> ^ <-- on top of a letter. Chapeau is the French word for hat. STOP DRESSING UP THE LANGUAGE; IT STILL SUCKS. Greek, Russian and most Asian languages are also difficult to write for those who are not great at drawing. It's mostly symbols; you could be trying to say "Hi, how are you?", and one little screw up will make it look like "Hi, hoe are you?" Not only do you sound like you are dyslexic, but you might have also insulted a martial artist or ninja, and it's now open season on your ass.
Even so, I don't think any other languages can make you feel as stupid as English. There's so many different words to describe the same damned thing, you can spend hours groping for the right word, and still not come across it. I still haven't thought of the one I wanted!
Take blue for example; it's a colour. A simple, plain colour. But no, we had to take it one step further. There's also cyan, ocean, teal, turquoise, lapiz, cerulean, navy, sapphire and a myriad of other fucking words to describe this one colour. Do we need all of this? Is not adding 'dark' or 'light' to blue not enough to get your point across?? I'm STILL coming up with different blue names as I write this, and I go back to the list to add them every time!
Because of this vastly descriptive language, you can either;
A. Spend hours trying to find the exact right word to fit the mood/theme/overall right word to describe your noun.
B. Discover that the word you've been using to describe a noun is not correct at all, and you will have to do option A all over again.
C. Get stumped trying to think of a word you know that you KNOW fits exactly what you want to say, but you can't remember it because of all the other equally viable, but not as perfect, words blocking your brain's access to that word.
Needless to say, Vander does not like feeling that she became a language's bitch because the language is an unmitigated ass and likes to be fucking complicated. Some of you are going to dictionary.com right now because I'm using words very few people use. Not only is English making you its bitch, but some of these words are intimidating.
But I win this time, English; I'm dissing you with yourself. Fuck you and the high horse you rode in on.
By the way, I remember the word I wanted now; it was conceited. And I spelled that right without having to use the spell check. Who's the idiot now, English?!
PS; I used the spell checker to make sure I didn't look like an idiot, and apparently Blogger's spell check doesn't have all the words in it. Suck it again, English.
